Why Does Volvo Get A Pass For Being Boring?

"Wobbles the Mind" (wobblesthemind) 06/15/2016 at 21:10 • Filed to: Volvo

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Im just curious why enthusiasts are still into Volvo? They announced that all their vehicles will be solely FWD-biased, transverse 4-cyls with hybrid variants replacing future diesels. A majority of the models have an overly complex drivetrain that alternates using a supercharger and a turbocharger to match a 2.3L turbocharged engine and there are no manuals going forward (for the US anyways).

Volvo is currently less reliable than Audi, building vehicles that have bland front ends and Chrysler-style interiors with slow touchscreens. Like Acura and Mitsubishi, they don’t make anything like the family or rally cars you all are nostalgic over. Plus, everyone is creaming themselves over a midsize crossover and 2 ton midsize sedan. Why not save yourself 300lbs and get a Lincoln MKZ Black Label?

Volvo doesnt offer any coupes, convertibles, roadsters, sportcars...just sedans that cost more than sports sedans or premium brands, a couple of crossovers, and some wagons/hatchbacks that come with a factory liftkit and some bodycladding. Have you looked at how many V60s are the Cross Country versions? Your wagons are sold as crossovers, brah.

Volvo’s autonomous tech is stuck on Mustang, and whenever Tesla shows huge progress in technology Volvo looks down its nose and tries to blow a whistle on something that isn’t regulated enough to tattle tale on! In fact, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! than Mariah Carey’s sun hat in the middle of an afternoon J-Lo concert.

I’m just curious though. There seems to be a bit of a disconnect since you guys say you love RWD vehicles, leightweight, great power, standout looks, and a great value. You don’t want electronic nannies but Volvo has so many !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ! Now they did announce that all Volvo’s going forward will be interesting to drive, just in time for you to be unable to drive them! Why does Volvo get a pass for being the complete opposite of everything we love? They aren’t even quirky anymore! Is it all just blind nostalgia?

*Note, I’m focused on Volvo in the US market.

Just something from !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! for 2016. This is predicted reliability across the entire brand for 2016.

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

CB > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:16

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Yeah, a boring four-cylinder engine. That’s also twincharged. Because that’s super boring and not cool as hell.

jkm7680 > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:18

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Totally agree. Everybody is so ready to suck their dick constantly on FP for some reason.

It’s also really nice to see Audi on top of reliability rankings, for once.

not for canada - australian in disguise > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:20

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I don’t really think Volvo are BORING, but I do find it quite ironic that people on the FP have a massive hardon for any car that rolls out of Gothenburg but will criticize literally every safety feature put on any other car, when Volvo’s main appeal is safety. I have a feeling the love Volvo gets has SOMETHING to do with them sponsoring the FP for a while.

Still, wouldn’t mide an S90 as a comfy long distance cruiser, or an XC90 as a family car. The V60 and XC70 are aight too. Still, hardly the most amazing brand out there. Volvo are good at making great family cars, they do a good combination of safety, efficiency, and practicality. I have no idea why the FP thinks they’re some sort of “performance” brand. Other than the 850R, and maybe the S60R, I can’t think of many really good fast Volvos that actually could really compete with Ze Germans.

TL;DR, Volvo, just keep making really good family cars and stop trying to be something you aren’t, a performance brand.

FromCanadaWithLove > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:22

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What’s this plastic-clad XC90? First time I’ve seen one.

S65 > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:22

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Maybe people expect if from volvo? They aren’t known for being exciting.

Noah - Now with more boost. > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:23

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Yeah I think we’re just past the era of cool Volvos. As far as I’m concerned, no turbo 5 or 6 = no deal. This is the direction everyone is heading in though and we all know it :(

Hoard the cool stuff while you can.

Wobbles the Mind > CB 06/15/2016 at 21:23

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It’s only supercharged at the bottom end of the rpm range and the turbo takes over at the top end. The supercharger is torque fill like an engine dragging, less effective electric motor. Every single other brand including Hyundai, Jaguar, and Honda just retune the engine to have a broader range utilizing just a standard turbocharger.

not for canada - australian in disguise > S65 06/15/2016 at 21:23

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They are probably known for being the LEAST exciting car brand ever.

EXCITEMENT!

My citroen won't start > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:24

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Because Volvo actually seems to give a fuck and because they are tremendously good at what they are doing right now.

Slant6 > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:25

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Have you driven one lately?

TheHondaBro > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:27

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Because Volvo is a Jalopnik sponsor and we all must love them because.

CB > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:27

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Still cool.

Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:29

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Volvo and Audi are two marques that seem to put an emphasis on “design” rather than performance outright luxury. The kind of understated car an architect or an artist would buy.

Now, all of that is just marketing bullshit, but it does make a big difference in public perception. To me, Volvo is just a Euro Acura with better ergonomics and less sporting pretension. I wouldn’t buy one over an Audi or Lexus, but then again I’ve never driven one.

Probenja > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:30

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Yes, their styling is bland but it is elegant and it will look good for many years. I think currently Hybrid is the way to go into the future rather than diesel, especially after diesel gate came out.

Volvo gets a pass if they aren’t rwd, light or even fun to drive because they are not meant to, they are large, comfortable cruisers and they are doing innovating cars, that is what we enthusiasts like.

Not every car needs to be a Miata, Charger Hellcat or a 300D Wagon to be an enthusiasts car, some people are enthusiasts and like Camry’s and that is fine with me.

Wobbles the Mind > FromCanadaWithLove 06/15/2016 at 21:31

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It’s just a low spec version without the Thor’s Hammer DRLs. Just saw one and it inspired me that the vehicle is in fact pretty bland. Once you see a car dirty, you’ll know how it’ll age.

Wobbles the Mind > My citroen won't start 06/15/2016 at 21:32

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What brand doesn’t give a fuck? Subarus are running the same level of safety tech.

JR1 > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:33

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I could not agree more. There are few if any Volvos I have ever lusted after

Alfalfa > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:35

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No more boring than Subaru, but no one questions that. FWD biased, 4 cylinders with large emphasis on safety. Modern examples have them beat on reliability sure, but since when was that a major concern among emthusiasts?

To be honest, I’m not really into much Volvo has done since Ford owned them. But I still wouldn’t call them the opposite of everything we love. I’m not sure I would call any manufacturer the opposite of everything we love. That being said, any internet community is a hive mind. It’s not as much so on Oppo, but there’s still the opinion that RWD trumps all even though most own FWD.

Wobbles the Mind > Slant6 06/15/2016 at 21:35

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I drove an XC90 over the weekend. I liked it! That’s why I’m not understanding why everyone is in love with it. It’s an MDX but fresher.

Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:36

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Does Mitsubishi give a fuck tho?

My citroen won't start > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:36

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Not even close, Volvo’s plan is to end all traffic fatalities by 2020, the new XC90 has safety features that are basically unheard of. Not to mention the leap in quality and design.

Wobbles the Mind > Probenja 06/15/2016 at 21:39

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So why doesn’t modern Toyota, Hyundai, Honda, Nissan, Acura, Buick, Lincoln, or Chrysler get a pass then? None of them are supposed to be performance driven brands, they just offer performance focused vehicles whenever they get the opportunity. I feel like Volvo gets a pass because everyone gave up on them long ago, and therefore they are cool with enthusiasts.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > My citroen won't start 06/15/2016 at 21:40

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What does that roller thing do

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:41

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Oh boy, where to start.

It’s a 2.0, not a 2.3.

Who gives a fuck about diesel in passenger vehicles anymore?

FWD is the norm now. Get over it.

You can’t sell a manual luxury car in the US anymore unless it’s seriously sporty.

The front ends are minimalist, but not bland. How well do you think the new Audi Q7 or BMW X5 will look in 10 years?

Chrysler interiors? Sure, the current S60/V60 have mediocre interiors, but have you been in the new XC90?

The S90 is a thoroughbred luxury sedan. The MKZ is a gussied-up Ford Fusion with an ugly rear end (and I’m a Ford owner).

Do you really think all those Coupes, Convertibles, Roadsters, and Sports Cars will sell well enough for Volvo to justify them?

You do realize that the car in that one video didn’t have that safety suite equipped, right?

It’s not blind nostalgia, it’s the fact that they’re satisfying vehicles with just enough Swedish quirkiness to make them interesting. Old RWD Volvos were no better than old RWD Mercs, or even old FWD Saabs. And if you don’t think they’re quirky anymore, look at the details. A little cartoon spider for third row occupants. A starter switch that pays homage to Saab. Styling your headlights after a god’s weapon of choice. The way those taillights flow down the back like strawberry syrup. The sort-of linear wood in the Inscription models. The beautiful amber leather. Twincharged production cars. The relentless pursuit of safety and efficiency, while still being satisfying and in some cases engaging to drive. Current Volvos are the type of cars that Mercedes used to build. Now I’m not a fanboy of Volvos, in fact I kind of hate working on them and parts availability is a bit slim. But you can’t deny that they’re good cars that, while not always stirring your soul, give you an impression of self-worth, without being obnoxious or pretentious. They’re the anti-BMWs, and for that, we are grateful.

Dusty Ventures > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:43

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In my case I like Volvo less as an object of want and more as a general admiration of their drive. Their commitment to safety and the innovations that have resulted from that are extremely impressive.

That said, this is teh sex:

Wobbles the Mind > Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed 06/15/2016 at 21:43

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They do! I’ve never seen a brand work so hard to stay in a market they lost back in 2009. They really are trying to make soup from nothing. Nissan wouldn’t have had the opportunity if Mitsubishi had of given up when we all told them to.

scoob > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 06/15/2016 at 21:44

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Looks like a terrain selector thingy on a Land/Range Rover, etc.

Slant6 > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:45

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I’d call it a genuine X5 equivalent. Have you been in an Inscription or an R design? The Momentum is a bit cheaper, but it’s still a lot of car for the price. I don’t think everyone is in love with them. FP might be but when have they ever been right about anything?

I love them, they’re doing some great stuff and they’re killing it with design. S90 is easily the freshest looking sedan on the market.

Also the T8 XC90 has 400 horsepower and has a sub 6 second 0-60 time, all while getting 59mpgE, which is no small feat for a SUV that seats 7.

Cash Rewards > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:46

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I disagree about looks and interior, but that’s subjective. I like them because they have a principle, above seeking cars (others have mentioned their aim to end vehicular fatalities). Compare that to VW’s ethos (sell a fuck ton of cars, ethics be damned), Nissan (sell cars), etc.

Wobbles the Mind > My citroen won't start 06/15/2016 at 21:50

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Autonomous braking? Driver drowsiness alert? Carbon Dioxide sensors? Under hood pedestrian airbags? Night vision? All things everyone is working on or already implementing. The leap in quality is them charging the same as a luxury manufacturer rather than a premium one like they were. The Saab ignition isn’t anything new and all redesigned vehicles over $50k have softouch materials. I love the XC90, but that’s because it’s a comfortable vehicle, like a Grand Cherokee’s non-outdoorsie brother.

Wobbles the Mind > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 06/15/2016 at 21:51

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Changes drive modes. It’s pretty much a dial.

Probenja > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:53

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I feel like it has a little bit of what you say but also it has the “wow factor” that is the change from the old XC90 to the new one or from the S80 to the S90, similar to what happened when Hyundai introduced the Fluidic Sculpture in their cars and people started really liking them for a while and now the novelty has died off because they are more of an evolution from the previous car rather than a revolution. In the case of Volvo the jump in the design, quality and tech was the “wow factor” that was hyped even more by the press because they were getting the “classic” Volvos that people liked back.

Wobbles the Mind > scoob 06/15/2016 at 21:54

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It changes the drivemodes. Just like all cars with eco, normal, sport, sport+, mud, snow, so on modes. It’s nice though, but more finicky than a dial when actually driving.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:55

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I am a Volvo fan, but I I’ll try to keep this as unbiased as possible.

I disagree with a lot of your points.

Even if you are one of the “no replacement for displacement” guys, you have to be amazed with the engineering. It’s 4 cylinder that is both turbo and ssupercharged and it’s more powerful and efficient than the similar 6 cylinders. Next gen Polestar will make over 600 hp from that engine. That’s amazing.

I question those reliability ratings. Companies lose points if someone doesn’t like the built in GPS or they have a little technology problem. It’s very rarely a serious mechanical issue.

Most every car now has a similar big grille face. The interior is Nowhere near a Chrysler. That’s an insane comparison.

Volvo technically is a premium brand. So yes they will follow similar pricing.

Your autonomous comment makes no sense. If you are referring to that one XC60 that hit the guy, remember that the driver TURNED THAT OFF before testing. So obviously it won’t work. They made a pledge to have no deaths in their cars by 2020. A big claim but it shows how much they care.

To be honest I didn’t know many people liked the new Volvos. I do because they are doing their own thing. It’s a nice alternative to the generic German choice. And the new XC90 is in a class all by itself.

Sure the modern Polestar is not as quick as the M or AMG. But it isn’t supposed to be. That’s not who Volvo is. They haven’t changed their ways since they came to America. They wanted to sell a safer, different car from the Germans. They are doing great at that.

Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:55

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Compact economy, 2 row CUV. They do seem to be following the struggle car manufacturer playbook to the T.

for Michigan > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 21:59

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I completely disagree with your take on their styling. Volvo’s new styling language is breathtaking. Most other brands looks childish and overwrought by comparison.

No clue what your problem with twin-charging is, but I think it’s awesome. Sure, it’s not Chapman’s approach to automotive design, but Volvo and Lotus have two very different mission statements. And economy/emissions requirements are increasingly pushing us to a place where Volvo’s approach makes more sense.

gmctavish needs more space > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 22:00

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Speaking for myself, I’ve always loved Volvo and I don’t quantify or defend that position, I just have a thing for Volvos. Speaking for the general acceptance of them, I’d hazard a guess that it’s because they’re somewhat of an underdog, in their current position. Plus, they’re the only luxury manufacturer making cars that don’t look overwrought. Audi was fine a couple years ago, but now they’re getting angular and unpleasant. BMW and Mercedes were good a couple years ago too, but now BMW is getting...off in some way, I’m not sure what, maybe all the creases and such. Mercedes just looks busy as hell, I can’t see any of their current offerings looking good in 5 years, save for the GT. Also twin charging is awesome, I’m surprised anyone is doing it right now, let alone Volvo.

Alternately, everyone could just be trying to butter them up enough that they’ll give us this

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 22:01

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I have a thing that changes drive modes too. Comes with six options: backwards: slowest, very slow, slow, and so on,

Birddog > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 22:02

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Dude.. You think too much.

Volvo perfected Beige with the 140 and stayed alive by not changing.

Other marques fell. Volvo soldiers on.

Why? Because they set the bar low. Only twice has Volvo reached too high and both times they failed. They learned a lesson.

My citroen won't start > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 06/15/2016 at 22:19

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Selects drive mode (Eco - Sport - Normal) I guess.

My citroen won't start > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 22:24

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Don’t you dare to compare the vastly superior new XC90 to the outdated GC.

Milky > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 22:41

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You can’t even get one that base in the U.S.

dtg11 - is probably on an adventure with Clifford > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 22:41

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For similar equipment levels, the Volvo is much cheaper than a BMW or MB. It’s far more reliable than most BMW’s and Benz’s. They look fantastic (base model less so, but that’s true with most cars). The interiors are some of my favorites, the touchscreen works great, and they are pretty efficient for being the size/class they are. They’re not supposed to be fun to drive or sporty perse, they’re supposed to be safe and comfortable.

Also Consumer Reports must be crazy; Audi is antithesis of reliable.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 23:07

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Mainly because, having been in some of their modern cars, I don’t find them boring at all. In fact, I find their cars to be some of the most striking and, dare I say it, sexy cars on the market. They are fantastically safe to the point where it’s almost amusing, and they demonstrate a level of refined taste that doesn’t say “I just wanted a fancy badge”. I am to the point where if you asked me if I’d rather have a Volvo or a Lincoln, I would not only take the Volvo but probably also look at you funny.

Wobbles the Mind > Milky 06/15/2016 at 23:14

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They are gone for 2017 since 3 out of 5 XC90s are the T6. That SUV is killing it since everyone is spending $10k over what Volvo was expecting. Wildly successful in the US! So expect to keep seeing higher and higher trims added like the 500 lb-ft Optimazation Package and that 4 seater limo version. Volvo is killing it!

Amoore100 > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 06/15/2016 at 23:17

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Thanks for putting into words what I was gonna say, saved me a lot of time typing. Although I’m partial to Swedish cars, I recognize their flaws and nothing’s perfect. I guess the reason I still love them is because they’ve always been just a bit out of touch with the automotive world, like a twincharged 4 instead of a normal V6, or a complicated Haldex turbo 5 powertrain instead of a easier RWD turbo 6.

nafsucof > Wobbles the Mind 06/15/2016 at 23:52

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Volvo = Safety

People are blinded by the fact that they aren’t the only safe cars on the road. Volvo drivers are seldom swayed from the brotherhood of Sweden. I mean they ARE good cars but I think they’ve gotten to complicated too.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Dusty Ventures 06/15/2016 at 23:53

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The people complaining about Volvo’s design being boring, are what lead us to the atrocity that is Lexus’, and Nissan’s design language.

Amoore100 > Wobbles the Mind 06/16/2016 at 00:21

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Wait wait wait wtf how are Acura and Infiniti below Volvo and VW in terms of reliability?! What is this logic?!

Cé hé sin > Wobbles the Mind 06/16/2016 at 04:47

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“They announced that all their vehicles will be solely FWD-biased, transverse 4-cyls with hybrid variants replacing future diesels”

They’re going to make cars with whatever kind of engine buyers want, be it petrol or diesel and with or without electrons. They’re not on a mission to eliminate diesels.

Anyway, most Volvos have been four cylinder since they began making cars and 4wd is relatively recent.

jkm7680 > My citroen won't start 06/16/2016 at 07:35

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Besides the fact that they’ve been having reliability issues.....

StndIbnz, Drives a MSRT8 > Wobbles the Mind 06/16/2016 at 08:57

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No idea. I’ve never really seen the appeal of Saab or Volvo.........though the Polestar’s are kinda cool.

BigBlock440 > Wobbles the Mind 06/16/2016 at 09:07

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Because they’re “European” and European = cool to people who have never been there.

TysMagic > Wobbles the Mind 06/16/2016 at 09:55

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I don’t give it a pass. They make boring cars. Which is probably why I’ve featured a couple on the insta #shameless

gawdzillla > Wobbles the Mind 06/16/2016 at 10:48

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VW ....and Nissan

RT > Wobbles the Mind 06/16/2016 at 18:50

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Off the top of my head:

Subtle, but brilliantly proportioned design.

Lots of luxury, done better than most other brands as of late.

Generally a higher quality control than most mainstream brands.

Depreciation makes up for the price tags.

Still good to drive despite four cylinders and we get Polestars etc.

They’re the King of the modern family cars with plenty of wagons/estates. They can even do SUVs well (see new XC90).

They’re one the few modern mainstream car brands that does a solid job throughout all its lineup. The only one that can match them right now is Mazda.